Doing Too Much for Too Many for Too Long? It Stops Right Here

“Ummm, okay, sure, I guess I can drive you to the airport,” I said when a friend called not too long ago to ask for a ride to catch an early morning flight. On the outside I was all agreeable and nice. Inside, though, I was thinking something totally different. My inner voice sounded like this, “No freakin' way! Remember how you left me stranded at the airport that time after agreeing to pick me up. I’m not OK that you assume I’ll do whatever you want.”

Did I say anything close to that out loud? No. I was afraid of being disliked. So I just drove her to the airport. And then I resented her. I seethed and then responded to my self-loathing with righteous thoughts justifying the fact that I had caved and didn’t set a boundary. I told myself, I’m a good person. It’s no big deal. I’m taking the high road and getting all kinds of karma points. This is what friends do for each other. But I knew she wasn’t a true friend. She wouldn’t do the same for me. Our relationship wasn’t balanced, and I felt like a doormat.