Beyond becoming a mother, the biggest change in my life happened when I retired from a 33-year career in cutting-edge technology, the last 24 of them with IBM.

Back then, the earliest age you could retire with full benefits from ever-shrinking Big Blue was 55. I was in no hurry; thought I’d wait until I was 58. Then I decided to wait until I looked 58. And then, when I realized that I was going to get a lump sum instead of a full pension, I decided I’d wait until they forced me go.

NextTribe creates small group travel experiences for women 45 and over. If you’re ready to stop waiting and start going, we’d love to have you along. Check out all our trips here.

As always, life happens. My dad died, my mom gradually needed more attention, and I was spending a lot of time flying back and forth between North Carolina and New York where she lived. So, at the beginning of 2013, I told my manager that if the company was looking for volunteers for the next down-sizing, I’d be willing. I knew that the lay-off packages were becoming less generous. The timing seemed right.

That June, he called to tell me I’d been tapped. I was prepared, had heard rumors about the actual date, and came to work in my best suit and heels. People asked why I was so dressed up, to which I answered, “I’m getting laid off today.” To add to the humor, my boss was more nervous and upset than I was, and I wound up consoling him!

Filling the Void

I quickly became busy with lots to do at the office: forms to sign, projects to finish, people to coach, a retirement party to plan. I also had lots to do at home. I started a small website business, trained to become yoga teacher, and stepped up my senior caretaking duties. I spent most of the next year convincing my mom to move into a retirement community near me…and then, step by step, getting her here. My professional employment had been my pride and the all-consuming, organizing principle in my adult life; all this new activity helped me cope with (and ignore) its absence.

Within a few months, the full impact of retirement finally hit me. It was like getting laid off a second time.

The three years my mom spent in NC gave us a wonderful opportunity to bond. Although it took up a lot of my time, I am very grateful for it. When she died in 2016, comfortable and ready at the age of 93, I first found myself busy again, very involved with all the end-of-life tasks, and then…BOOM! Within a few months, the full impact of retirement finally hit me. It was like getting laid off a second time.

I had again lost my main gig and what was left didn’t seem to fill the empty space. My kids were grown and gone, my boyfriend didn’t live with me, I didn’t even have a pet! I felt bored, restless, lonely.

The Modern Version of Running Away with the Circus

Are you ever too old to run away from home, maybe with the proverbial circus? For me the answer was “No” and, luckily, I discovered a more modern version. I became a digital nomad! I joined a remote work/travel program that provided housing and co-working space in cities all over the world. Taking my web business with me, I gave up my yoga teaching jobs, left my sweet little house, and headed south, south, south…to South America.

The camaraderie was as strong as the challenges, and every day seemed like a new adventure.

I spent a month in each of Argentina, Chile, and Peru—traveling, living, and co-working with a fun and interesting group of people ranging in age from 25-72. It turned out to be a huge success, rich with exciting experiences. Far from packaged vacations or the quickie visits to ports that you get on a cruise ship, I got to live like the locals, immersed in their culture.

The camaraderie was as strong as the challenges, and every day seemed like a new adventure. Because my web work was just part-time, I was able to enroll in Spanish language programs, explore the neighborhoods, dance often, and go to yoga classes.

I took numerous tours and excursions, which included trips to museums, historical sites, and local markets, plus dramatic events like sandboarding in the Concón Dunes, touring Iguazu Falls (see top photo), flying over the Nasca lines in Peru, hiking Machu Picchu, and floating through the Ballestas Islands.

More Than Transitional—Transformative

More than transitional, those three months were transformative. They gave me a different attitude and approach to retirement, to life itself. Coming home also required a big adjustment—from living with a community in minimal apartments to being alone in my overly furnished house, from daily trials and discoveries to the all-too-familiar suburbia.

My biggest worry after coming home was how could I maintain a sense of wonder.

My biggest problem (and worry) was to maintain a sense of wonder, keep the wanderlust going, and not fall into depression. One of the women on the South American tour told me about NextTribe and it has been the perfect solution. Well-organized trips with active, like-minded women to new and interesting places? I practically shouted, “sign me up!”

It’s the sisterhood-on-the go that I sorely needed and it has kept me both connected and happy. I have found my tribe!

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I wrote many blogs about my South American adventure and a few haiku poems that I featured on my website home page with coordinating banner images. This is one of my favorites:

Above the Horizon

You seek perspective?

Then travel far and return.

You, your world, both changed.